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The Wizards do something hilarious every game
The Washington Wizards are the gift that keeps on giving to start the new season. The Wizards were always going to be dreadful by design this year after their newly hired front office began a full roster teardown that included trading Bradley Beal and Kristaps Porzingis over the summer. Washington is bad alright, but they’re not just that. The Wizards are the funniest team in the NBA, as my colleague James Dator recently called them, and they continue to provide comedy on a game-to-game basis.

Good morning, I’m Dan Gartland. I never thought I’d care so much about a Sun Belt football team, but I’m irate that James Madison won’t be allowed to play a bowl game this year.
In today’s SI:AM:
☘️ The Celtics’ impressive win
😈 The NBA’s greatest villain
🚫 Draymond’s suspension
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Nicolai Højgaard walks with his caddie toward the 18th green during the first round of the 2023 DP World Tour Championship. | Photo by Ross Kinnaird/Getty Images
Some of the best European players on the planet are at the top of the leaderboard at the DP World Tour Championship in Dubai.
Nicolai Højgaard, the young Dane who made his Ryder Cup debut this Fall, holds a share of the lead after round one at the DP World Tour Championship in Dubai.
The 22-year-old bomber carded a 5-under 67 Thursday, which included a barrage of birdies on the back-nine.

Stephen A. after dark is wild.
Stephen A. Smith conjured mixed emotions, I get it. Has First Take greatly contributed to the decline of quality sports broadcasting? Yes. Did it start the trend of hot-takes dominating the sports sphere? Absolutely. Do I still want to hear about Stephen A. Smith give his opinions on sex and how to lie to your partner? Indeed I do.
The Stephen A. Smith Show has been running for a month now on YouTube for those who need more yelling in their lives, but unlike screaming about the Cowboys, SAS helps fans with burning questions about their love lives.

Ravens coach John Harbaugh said that his brother, Michigan coach Jim Harbaugh, had his personal electronic devices searched as part of the probe into allegations of in-person scouting and sign-stealing, he told reporters on Tuesday.
“His phones, his computers and all that stuff has been looked at, and he’s come through this thing with flying colors,” John Harbaugh said. “I don’t know what they’re trying to get, but they don’t have anything of substance.

The Philadelphia 76ers played host to the Boston Celtics on Wednesday night with a chance to take over the top spot in the Eastern Conference. Things didn’t go as planned for Philly, however, despite the fact that both Kristaps Porzingis and Jaylen Brown didn’t suit up for Boston. Not only did the 76ers lose the game 132-126, based on Joel Embiid’s postgame comments, they lost a serious amount of confidence as well.
Many pointed to the fact that the 76ers were on the back end of a back-to-back as to why they weren’t exactly fresh on Wednesday night.

Did former Texas A&M coach Jimbo Fisher know that he was about to get fired after his team’s 51–10 win over Mississippi State?
There’s no way to know for certain, but after Fisher’s postgame speech that lacked the expected passion of a team that won a game by six touchdowns, college football fans were left perplexed.
Here’s the video footage from Fisher’s locker room speech following A&M’s victory on Saturday, in which the former Aggies coach did not seem as excited as one would expect.

Call him a villain. Dillon Brooks doesn’t care. Say he’s arrogant, a bully, toxic to a team. He’s heard it, read it, doesn’t think much of it. “Everyone wants to hate on something,” says Brooks. Say he’s the reason for the Grizzlies’ first-round elimination from the playoffs last April, because early in the series against the Lakers he had the gall to publicly poke LeBron James. He thinks it’s stupid, but whatever. “We didn’t have our whole squad, and they did,” says Brooks. “People forgot about that. Just threw it on me.